Diwali Dhamaka

Come Diwali, all you see around you is lot of pomp and colour. Apart from this,

Newspapers carry free hand outs with advertisements about the latest in shopping and various discounts.

Magazines and the cookery shows in the T.V. will crackle crisply with various recipes to be specially tried for Diwali, but the same when tried at home will shape up like some rare species.

T.V and the FM channels screaming with textile ads, jewellery ads, sweet shop ads.

And most importantly,the Dos and Donts exploding in every nook and corner.Oh ya, I very well know that I should not burst a cracker near a hospital.

Allright, these are some minor things and I am willing to overlook them. But there are a couple of things which I get highly pissed off about.

The T.V. channels , in the name of showing some “inthiya tholaikatchigalil muthal murayaga” movie, butchers the programme by long good trains masquerading as advertisements. I shall bow my head to anyone who has watched a full film or a complete programme telecast on a festival day. Infact, I am very sure that the number of times the T.V. audience hopping across channels on a festival day like this will be more than what they do all through the year.

The second thing that am wary of is the bakshanams that come from ethir veetu mami, pakkathu veet akka and so on. May be they all think one should have diabetes after Diwali. Oh, I am not being rude or insensitive to those who suffer from that affliction. People constantly feed you with sweets…there will be so many sweet boxes at home by the end of the day that the amount of sweets fed can actually feed an entire wedding

So what I am I going to do for this Diwali? I plan to wake up by 4 a.m. because that’s the time I can watch T.V without any ads butchering the programme.I wish to start off my day with peace. Secondly, I donot intend to stuff myself with all kind of bakshanams and sweets to match with the frequency of an ad shown on the T.V. Otherwise, who knows …any noise heard might not be that of crackers alone…

All said and done, Wish you a very Happy Diwali!

Before the journey...

SHE: I will be there around 2 in the afternoon.
HE: Ya come soon.
She reaches He's place
SHE: Hi, packing ellam aacha?
HE: illa da, last leg of the packing on.
After some help with the packing,
SHE:seri, naan kadaikku poittu varen.
HE: Ethukku?
SHE: I want to get you a shirt or a t shirt for diwali
HE:I already have so many, you have seen them no?
SHE: Ya so what? I want you to wear a new dress for diwali.
HE: Seri, get only one.
She happily indulges in shopping, comes home with 2 t shirts and hands them over to HE.
HE: Giving a very angry look, ethukku da 2 vaangina? nee nenaikkaratha thaan da pannuva. I told you to buy just one.
SHE: Its ok no, I just got 2 avlo thaan.
He draws a blank and then looks at the t shirts once again and says "oh, intha modela, supera irukku da" and keeps one inside the baggage and one for wearing it for the travel.
SHE tells herself: Oh, ya I know you will like it, athaan vaanginen.
************************************************************************************
SHE: I will miss you so much
HE: Ya , me too da
SHE: Been so used to these 5 months of seeing you every weekend, playing badminton, going out, the bike rides.
HE: Ya I know, enakkum thaan da.Anyways this is the last wait for us.Another 2 months only
SHE: Ya, hopefully.
SHE:Naanum kooda varatta?
HE: Enga?
SHE: USkku
HE: Innum 2 months thaan da, apparam nee koodavey irukkalam
HE: Be happy da, all that matters to me is your happiness.
SHE: Hmmm, ya, am happy, you also be happy.Good luck and happy journey
************************************************************************************

My dear HE, you precisely know what to say especially at a time when we are away from each other. Dont you?You are the best!

The last and final warning

Dear elevator guy

Hi
I know we have somehow been taking the elevator at the same time in the evening everyday for the past couple of weeks and that makes us...lift mates? may be?

I get off at the ground floor to take the shuttle bus, while I assume you take the elevator just to drop me..cos I havent seen you getting out of the elevator at the ground floor.Now before this starts to sound like a Bollywood romance in a lift, let me move on and clarify a few things.

Now, about our meeting which has been regularly happening for the past 2 weeks in the elevator-is by itself no big deal and nothing great. I just dont understand how an elevator can be this slow and this gives you all the time and excuse to stare at me. I am sure by now, you must be grasping why I am writing this letter.DONOT stare at me. I know people generally like to look/ observe others.Its fine, but your ogling, eye popping unbashed stare is uncalled for and hihgly irritating. And for Gods' sake, why do you ahve to continue staring till the moment I step out of the lift? I would rather appreciate discreet stares than something like your unwarranted and unfair stares which stays till the moment I step out of the elevator.

A random one -off act on the road or elsewhere is totally fine with me, but indulging in it every single day gets on my nerves.It is simply not happening.I cannot be continuing to ignore this for a long time unlike what I did the first 2 days of this irritating behaviour of yours.I did ignore the first two days, then stared back at you the third day you did it, thinking you would understand. I thought me realising about your ogling and staring back would embarass you, but I guess the weekend gave you a chance to get over the embarassment and here we are again on a bright Monday morning with you, staring away to glory.

By now, you should be aware of my features better than I would be.So here I give you three options.Its upto you to take them or face the wrath from me. The crux is I dont appreciate you appreciating(???) me or my beauty (???)
1.Stop that nasty behaviour or get to hear some cuss words from me. You know, I enjoy talking that ways.
2.This is my last and final civil warning and you better stop , else I would not mind planting a slap on you.
3. Get hold of another subject- if at all you would find a willing taker who loves to be stared at and just leave me alone.

So calm, peace!!!I do not want violence.Better behave and dont tell me I didnt warn you.

The window seat and the rain...

It was about 2 years ago. I dont remember now.

I met her on the train.She took the window seat, while I settled down next to her.The rhythm of the moving train coupled with the falling rain outside makes one to easily indulge in nostalgia. For some it could be feelings, for some it could be memories, and for some it could be pain.

The woman next to me was crying silently.What was she crying about, I wondered.Has she lost something...or someone? a romance shattered? or problems at home?I dont know. She wasnt even sobbing, just some silent tears flowing down her cheeks which she wiped away periodically.

Why are you crying woman, I wanted to ask her..Whatever it is, a lost job, a broken affair, obnoxious people, oh just whatever it is, it is just not worth it, I wanted to tell her.Gently remind her that there is so much goodness that life brings with it and whatever it is, it could be just some minor setback

And today, when I was in the train, I remembered this woman and how she silently cried and how I silently chided her, wanting to make her understand.But now,I find myself at the window seat and I know that if I meet her today, I would just rush to her, look into her eyes and tell her
' I know, I understand..completely...'

Navarathri

The arrival of Navarathri is always associated with pomp and splendour.It is that time of the year

when schools close for vaccation
when kids are at their playful mood
when the kolu bommais are taken from the paran and religiously cleaned
when every little furniture at home is made to be a part of the instant kolu stand
when mustard seeds and green gram is made to sprout to be used as a park/ garden for your kolu
when dhavanis and pattu pavaidais see some light out of the cupboard and the girls gracefully wearing them to invite people for the kolu
when one lady outdoes another in consciously picking up a novel gift to be given along with the vethalai pakku
when each variety of sundal is planned for each day
when the kids make a bee line to various houses just to get the sundal
when all of us eagerly await the Saraswati pooja.

Now with the Navarathri halfway through, my loot for the week is 4 coconuts, 6 kannadis, 6 multi colour combs,4 kumkumam and 4 manjal dabbas and 2 ever silver kinnams. I have nothing to complain about.

You know you have been blogging like mad

When you remember your blog mate's URL much easily than your own postal address

When all your conversation revolves around who visited your page, how many comments, who commented first and so on

When you refer a recipe blog to cook your daily food

When after every sad incident, you dont feel bad cos you can blog your way to glory about that sad incident and find solace in the blogging community

When you start wishing that your bed room paint colour matched with your blog template colour

When you associate someone being very hep and smart and hot based on their blog template

When you threaten your love to stop arguing with you by telling him/ her that you would publish all details about the discussion on the blog

When you start looking at people as bloggers, non- bloggers and anonymouses

When you religiously keep track of the visitor count

When all you can dream is about what post you will publish the next day

HE SHE pesindaaley ....

HE & SHE are engaged and very few days left for the wedding

SHE is trying to reach HE from morning, but HE for some reason has not been able to pick up the phone call

SHE: Hello
HE: Hey sollu
SHE: enna ithu, phone edukka ivlo neram? enna pannina inniku? naan kaarthala irunthu unakku try pannaren theriyuma?
HE: Oh sorry ma, phone eduthu pakka kooda time illa theriyuma. Officela neraya velai, 3 weeks leavela porathunala, ella workum seekiram mudikkanum.
SHE: Athu seri, unakku enna pathi nenachu paaka enga time irukkum.
HE: Hey appdi ellam onnum illa. innikku konjam busy avlo thaan. naan unna pathi thaan 24 hrsum nenachundu irukken theriyuma?
SHE: Hmm,innikku lunch saapdarachey enna nenachiya?
HE: Athu vanthu..vanthu..err...
SHE: Po, nee romba busy, athula enna pathi nenaikka kooda unakku time illa, aana naan innikku madhyanam vetha kuzhambu saapdarachey, unna pathi thaan nenachen
HE :Naan innikku verum bread thaan ma saapten, naanum vetha kuzhambu saaptu iruntha unna pathi nenachuruppen.
SHE: Ei, enna jokea?naan evlo seriousa sollindu irukken, nee ippdi pesara?enakku evlo kashtama irukku theriyuma un kooda pesama. innum 10 naal thaan namma kalyanathukku irukku, enakku evlo exciteda irukku theriyuma? antha excitementa un kooda share pannikalamnu phone pannina, nee romba busynu sollara.
HE: Illa ma, naan joke pannala, sorry.
SHE: Nee onnum pesatha, enakku kashtamavum irukku, excitedavum irukku
HE: Enna kozhappara?
SHE: Aamam, excited for the wedding and that I would start a new life with you, but sad for leaving my family, appa amma
HE: Hmmm
SHE: Enna hmm? yean varutha padara, athaan naan irukkenennu solla maatiya?
HE: Ayyo, illa ma, un kooda thaan naan eppovumey iruppen
SHE: Appo yean sollala?
HE: Sorry, ippo enna panna sollara?
SHE: Onnum illa, nee poi un velaya paaru
HE: Hey enna ippdi, neen sogama irukkum pothu naan mattum eppdi velaya pakkaratham?
SHE: Onnum vendaam, thideer karisanam enakku vendaam
HE: Nijamma thaan sollaren, seri , ok, evening beachkku poittu, desi sangeethala saapadalam.
SHE: How sweet, unakku en mela evlo ishtam
HE: Yean, unakku saapadu vaangi kudutha thaan un mela ishtama?
SHE: Ei
HE: Hey seri seri, naan cabinkku poren. evening meet pannalam
SHE: Po, micha sandaya evening vechukkalam
HE : $###@@@!!!!?

Disclaimer: This is purely imaginative and is not me and my HE.

Messaging...

I am forever amazed by the kind of things that people think up to forward both on SMS and emails.

• Mahendra Singh Dhoni and his team are the true followers of Abdul Kalam: after all, they are the ones who made India a super power in 20-20.

• Pakistan’s Misbah-ul-Haq thought he was sending the ball to no-man’s land. But he did not know that there is a malayalee in every corner of the world.

These two SMSes made rounds big time 2 weeks ago. And, I got this one today morning:

Vaakiyathai Maatri Amaikkavum:

• Vaasanai roja vaadi pogalama?

Answer: Va Saroja odi pogalama?

Manytimes, these SMSes have too many needless capital letters and flippant spelling for any word that could be mispelt.

Another thing that irks me so much is people sending SMSes as messages to be run as creepy scrolls on music channels, whose comperers speak a language that would in comparison make SMSes worthy of Nobel Prize for literature.How crappy it is to send a SMS to someone through a music channel? It is like writing a love letter addressing it “to whomsoever it may concern”

I very often see messages like I love my wife/ husband in the music channel. Something typically like :Murali: I love my wife

I don’t know who this Murali is, but if any of you know this guy, please take him to the nearest psychiatrist. I think it’s a terminal case in need of immediate attention. Why would a guy send a message to a music channel professing his love to his wife, who I presume should be sitting right next to him? Or even if the said wife is not sitting next to him, shouldn’t he be sending his love message to his wife’s mobile than to the music channel? Its so crappy, scary and daunting. Who among the million population is Murali telling that he loves his wife? And why through the music channel?

GOD knows what! But if you know this Murali, or happen to speak to him or see him, please tell him thanks on my behalf for loving his wife. We womenfolk are truly saved!

You know......

You know you have come of age and on your own when....

You got to cook food yourself three times a day.

There is no vegetable in the fridge and you suddenly remember that you only have to get it.

You have to cut onions yourself.

You have to get up to open the door for your maid servant in the morning.

You buy Harpic and actually use it every week.

You need to keep track of the money all by yourself.

You know work sucks when....

Your boss is out of station and you never knew it.

You spend most of the day with tea breaks and snack breaks.

Blogging and orkutting seems to be the order of the day.

But after all this, you know life still has something nice to offer when....

Your love calls you just to find out how you are doing and if you ate properly.

You hear your niece talking some kiddy talk over the phone and your sister narrating stories about her.

Every weekend, you have some or the other delicacy being sent from your wud be in law's place.

You can do what you want to, go out when you want to, after all, for there is no one at home and you stay alone.


Some things like these, ya just some things like these tell me that life is at its best for me.

SHE is upto....

She has always been scared of water
She dreaded water rides
He encouraged She to get over the fear for water
All that She keeps thinking about is heads down, hands straight, chin level water ....
She is getting familiar with gliding, kicking, arm action and the basic stuffs


Oh ya, She has enrolled for swimming classes and is enjoying it thoroughly.